3. Location Location Location

3 months in, 9 to go and I’m getting worried. We have just passed the 20minute mark of the game and the opposition has been camped in my 22 since March. My scrum has collapsed, my scrumhalf is erratic and my out-halves defensive kicks to touch have repeatedly been blocked down. I seem to be suffering from Eddie O’Sullivan syndrome as my tactics and plans have blown up in my face. What’s gone wrong I hear you ask? Let me explain....

Up until very recently my understanding was that "compromise" was something that happened between two parties to resolve an impasse of some description. Person A wants to wear a black suit, person B wants to wear a white suit. This usually results in what is referred to as the "Grey Area" suit, also known as compromise. To women however compromise seems to mean something else entirely.

It all started innocently enough with a proposal being brought forward to the wedding “Comitéa”. Said proposal was for the wedding ceremony and reception to take place in the most popular, glamorous, spiritual and holiest of cathedrals in Limerick. Yes I am indeed speaking about Thomand Park. Think of this like attempting a drop goal from your own 10m line while the ref is playing advantage. Nothing to lose, slim chance or scoring, but on a windy day you’d never know.

Now I am in no way naive enough to believe that I was going to win that battle, but I figured aim high and you might get your compromise of somewhere half way. With Limerick vetoed the foot came down at the halfway point, my father’s home town of Birr Co. Offaly. My foot was also seen in many different locations along the N7 from Tipp to Kildare until it finally ended up about 15mins from Lucan in the Castleknock Hotel in County Dublin. PENALTY TRY under the posts to the bride.

This is not looking good. I need a Declan Kidney type resurrection to pull this one out of the fire. But I fear further “compromise” may be the order of the day :).